The DW thanks all who voted in Poll #2. Here’s how it turned out:
A dude is unlikely to do any of the following. But if he did, which would you most prefer?
Ride shirtless on a white steed- (21%)
Turn off the televised sporting event and cuddle – (8%)
Take a cooking class with you – (27%)
Talk about feelings – (21%)
Go to a Bright Eyes show with you and your girlfriends – (10%)
Change his ways – (21%)
Here’s what the DW gleans from these particular answers. Feel free to comment away and correct his dude-ish misconceptions. Remember, the DW knows nothing about women.
One observation: A theme seems to be that women would like dudes to offer up time together, but far prefer that time to at least have the illusion that the dude is interested, too. In other words, the TV and Bright Eyes answers had, for lack of a better word, punitive components. The dude is pretty openly in the position of doing something only because you want it. On the other hand, Take a Cooking Class and Talk About Feelings are both things a dude can do and, whether he’s enjoying those fairly undudelike things a whole lot or not, at least engage as if it was completely mutual.
One question: The DW is assuming that the 21% of you who voted for Ride Shirtless on a White Steed simply couldn’t resist the joke answer. True? Another possibility is that a Steed dude surely possesses an irresistible sense of humor. Or is it that you secretly want an old-school, unabashed, Fabio flexin’, pheromone exuding, heavy object lifting, lion taming, take an ox down with his bare hands manlyman like the DW?
One warning: For the 21% of you who chose Change His Ways? Stop it. Quit running your head into the wall. Yes, a dude can learn the difference between a duvet and a comforter and he can, by rote memorization, maybe learn to do his part with the folding the towels and putting them on the right shelf or whatever. But those are just little adjustments. Tasks. Blips. If you don’t like a dude’s ways, get another dude. If you listen to one thing the DW says, listen to this.
As for the related Poll 2A. For those who have an interest, the results were:
Which of the following has the DW actually done for the DW’s wife?
Ridden shirtless on a white steed – (2%)
Turned off a televised sporting event and cuddled – (25%)
Taken a cooking class with her – (31%)
Gone to a Bright Eyes show with her and her girlfriends – (22%)
Changed his ways – (14%)
Quickly one by one:
Shirtless on a white steed?- Not yet. But the night is young.
TV and cuddling? – The DW has, on separate occasions, turned off televised sporting events and cuddled, but the two have never been specifically linked.
Cooking class – You were correct. Some dudes like to cook and the DW is one of them.
Go to a Bright Eyes show – Um, no. The DW is only assuming this number is so high because you think, due to earlier indie rock type allusions, he might like Bright Eyes. He doesn’t. In fact, there is a special type of deep and visceral disgust a lot of dudes reserve for Bright Eyes and John Mayer and those types of dudes who have a finely honed act of sensitive B.S. that we can’t believe women actually buy. The DW knows there are women who annoy other women in this fashion, but none come to mind. Thoughts?
Changed his ways- See above. The DW is the DW, better or worse. Although he does now know what a duvet is. Sort of.
You might notice the link on the left that the DW is on Facebook, so come on by and say hello and give him a fake cupcake or post a funny video or challenge him to Scrabble. The DW has to say that Facebook seems more professional and versatile than MySpace, but he might prefer the messy free for all attitude of MS, at least so far. Case in point, the DW’s Facebook account is under “Dee Ude Whisperer” because they don’t allow pseudonyms. I mean it’s Facebook, not a passport application. So serious. Anybody know a way around that?
Also, the DW wanted to give, as the kids say, mad props to his international readers. Okay, so some of the tracking that points to international hits might be due to server location or however that works, but world domination has to begin somewhere, right? So, big ups to Austria, Australia, France, Venezuela, Great Britain, and, of course, the DW’s homies in Canada. Right on, Toronto. Right on.