Poll Results #16

Thanks to everyone for participating in yet another extremely scientific Dude Whisperer Poll. And don’t let John Zogby give you all that plus or minus 4% margin of error polling is an inexact science nonsense. This sh^t is 100% on the nose. Here’s what you said…

Is a dude’s bad fashion a dealbreaker for you?

Yes 24%
No 13%
Only if it’s, like, smooth jazz bad. 62%

Wait, so about a quarter of women would just look at your mock turtleneck ass and walk away? Sounds about right, actually.

And another 60 percent would walk away if you had on a Bill Cosby sweater? Actually, that sounds about right, too.

So, you were expecting the DW to be horrified by these results? Not so much. Look, the DW isn’t exactly a label whore. He can’t tell an alarmingly expensive pair of dark blue jeans from something off the rack at the Gap. He has no idea any more if his Chuck Taylors are cool again or passé again. He shops for clothes only slightly more often than he rotates his tires. Which is never.

But here’s the thing. If a dude dresses so particularly that his style isn’t just a little inept or sloppy or unhip, but his style is something you would outright call ‘smooth jazz bad’, it really does ask a woman to make some assumptions about him. For instance, take this look. The DW thinks it’s fair to walk away if white boy dreads aren’t your thing. After all, he believes it was Sir Isaac Newton who said, “Where there are white boy dreads, there will be white boy dread behaviors and ideas.” Simple as that.

Dudes, is a woman’s bad fashion a dealbreaker for you?

Yes. 15%
No. 46%
Um, there is no fashion if you’re naked? 38%

Just in case there was any doubt, this poll again reinforces the idea that dudes don’t really care that much about what you wear unless it involves a dramatic change in the amount of visible side boob .

Dress for each other, by all means, sexy ladies. But know that what most dudes learn to notice they are learning by rote. And chances are there are only two reasons they mention anything about your clothes or accessories. 1) They are in a relationship with you and have learned that noticing your new earrings makes you happy 2) They would like to touch your bare bouncy boobs and saying “Dang, that is a sweet blouse!” is the kind of thing they have learned will keep you at the bar for another drink.

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3 Responses to Poll Results #16

  1. Anonymous says:

    Your science is tight.

  2. claire says:

    okay, dude, i have to call you out here. you are a dude in a … shall we say “visually oriented profession”? i.e. your job–aside from advising us on the dudage–is to arrange materials–shapes and colors–in a visually pleasing, as well as practical manner.(yes, ladeez, i know the DW and know what he does for a living.)so you mean to tell me that the things on a woman’s body, that are arranged–shapes and colors–in what is intended to be a visually pleasing, as well as practical, manner … simply don’t mean anything to you?i cry foul. if someone comes up to you and asks you “is a woman’s clothing a deal breaker for you?” of course you’re going to say no, because that’s the mainstream dude narrative. EVERYONE–men and women alike–will say the same things about men and how men behave and how men think, even if they’re not true.seriously? fashion IS design. you’re gonna tell me that all the young dudes with so much design savvy aren’t gonna notice good, bad, or indifferent design?yes, i will believe that the prospect of immediate sex trumps a dude’s design sense. but when it comes to a relationship, to having to look at that over the breakfast table every day, or be seen with that in public?i think the dudes do protest too much.

  3. hi claire-you know, studies show that the dw’s profession is the one women find “sexiest”. it’s true. anyway, the dw has to stand by what he originally wrote. a hot woman in a poncho is still hot. would it be better she didn’t wear a poncho? sure. but it would also be better if the dw wasn’t such a f$cking slob, and the wifey sticks with him, anyway. fashion is one of those things dudes will deal with the way women deal with (insert unflattering, but non-dealbreaking dude behavior here). you don’t throw the babe out with the bathwater, my darling.the only exceptions, kinda like in the post regarding white boy dreads, would be if a sexy mama is dressed in a fashion that traditionally signals more than fashion. say, as a crusty punk, just for an example. a dude would still hook up with a crusty punk, but might rule her out for a relationship because he would make some certain assumptions about her beliefs and lifestyle based on her look. but even then, is the dealbreaker the fashion or the person he assumes she is because of fashion code?

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