I went out a recent Saturday night with my girlfriends to celebrate a friend’s birthday. At a bar, we met a group of cutie Irish lads. In fact, I met them first and as I was asking them if they’d seen my other girlfriend, she was off already meeting one of their friends somewhere else in the bar. Great! We all had our very own Irish cutie to hang with.
After a super fun night of carousing (including Karaoke), laughs, flirting and all around warmth and affection (albeit it somewhat alcohol induced) we paired off and I brought my Irish lad home. We spent the evening hanging out with some physical contact but not the “deed”. I like for that to be really special when it happens. The next day, my cutie and I had brunch, hung out, listened to music, played with my dog and just talked and shared with each other.
After a great day at brunch, with brunch cocktails flowing we came home to take a nap. We awoke 6 hours later in the middle of the night and Irish cutie realized, he need to go home! He scribbled his number down and I directed him to the train station to take him to his town. As I thought about what might come next I looked at the number he had scribbled and to my dismay, it was unreadable. I couldn’t make out several of the numbers. I don’t think he did this on purpose. I just think he really was in a rush to get back home after a whirlwind time spent having fun with me. It was the best 24 hour date ever!
I’m worried I’ll never see him again. I spoke with my other 2 girlfriends who had been paired there own Irish lad. Only one had their guys number! The other hadn’t given hers and had said, ” your friend will get it from my friend”.
I don’t want to hunt this guy down and the only way he might be able to get in touch with me is from my business card which I believe I gave him the night before.
Was he rejecting me by not getting my number? Why didn’t he ask for it as he left to go home? My girlfriend contacted him through his friend and he said that he had texted him, but if he doesn’t have my number then he can never find me again. Help me reel in my thoughts!
Firstly, this email confirms the DW’s assertion that if you have an Irish accent you can get blown almost at will in the United States of America. Congratulations, Irish dudes. I hope you’re enjoying our women. You dicks.
Secondly, the DW doesn’t know if he would exactly call what you had a Date. Something like Hookup or Rendezvous or Tryst might cover it a little better. Maybe Very Special Overnight Boobies Festival or Kissing the Pair of Blarney Stones if you’re feeling more descriptive. Date, however, implies that there was some sort of exploration about compatibility for a potential relationship, and that other Dates might follow if the first one went well. And that was never the intent of your Irish friend. For him, this was a fun night out and a chance to drink, flirt, sing, and hopefully release an Irish Spring onto the small of your back. That’s all.
Now, does this mean the Irish hate you and your friends? No. While it may be a bit shitty to leave illegible numbers, fake numbers, or no numbers at all, this isn’t a situation where these dudes intended to be diabolical and string you along and crush your hopes and dreams just for amusement. It was a drunken evening where a bunch of charming bullshitters took a shot at plowing through a girls’ night out birthday party. And pretty well succeeded. Oldest story in the history of humanity. Depending on how the night went down, one or all of these dudes might have been surprised they were expected to leave contact information or, frankly, that the latest bunch of American women whose panties they’ve managed to cast aside with a wink and a “Cheers!” even expected them to be there the next morning to begin with.
Anyway, don’t look at this as rejection. Rejection in this context would have been the dude scrambling for his underpants in the morning and streaking out the door with a transparently ridiculous excuse about a dying relative and needing to feed his pet iguana while explaining that it’s definitely, absolutely, positively nothing to do with you looking horrible or being a wee pain in the arse. This dude hung around, enjoyed your company, listened to your music, all that stuff that dudes are incapable of doing with people they don’t honestly like. He just left and won’t be back because that’s the dynamic of this situation. Sometimes you’re looking for The One, sometimes you’re looking for a fun time.
Which means you’re impulse is correct. Don’t track him down, lass. If he was interested in keeping in touch he would have made some effort to that end. Double checked he had your card. Called your phone so you had his number. Texted a pic of his sheleighleigh. Something. And his friends would have done the same. Dudes will try to play it cool sometimes, but not this cool. He’s just ramblin’ on.
Here’s to good times and fun sleepovers. Sometimes that’s all they are.